super mexican

This one goes out to Paul, the best Step-dad in the world. King snake killer, and a man of many traits. Super gardner, though he confuses cucumber seeds with watermellon seeds. A fanatic for burritos, and refried beans give him strength (of the buttttttt!). Super power-baby talk. A master at understand and conversing with babies.

Paul is one hard working mexicana. He works for Union Pacific Railroad, and when he is not on the train he is working for the WFWA (Wage free work association). If you have nothing to do but know that something should be done you can call paul and enjoy watching him hussle and bussle around your yard. You need a tower built and all you have is a yucca stick, a warped peice of wood, one nail, and a peice a wire, Paul can build it.

We just celebrated his 3 year sober birthday from alcohol. Though, you would never guess it as he has perfected the dance of "almost falling down". Please if you see him, move all baby walkers, chairs, and fill all holes with solid dirt. Stop him if he is pretending to ride an invisable motorcylce as he just may trip over his own feet.

The man is a fence building maniac. When the zombie apocolypse comes (I hope rabbits don't turn into zombies), I will be glad to have him not zombie-fied becaues I know he is capable of building a fortress in a matter of minutes. He express himself through the art of fencing and you can come experience a taste of the chain link paradise and walk through the labrynth of fencing around my moms house. However my dog tootsie is now testing his limits as he opens gates, and soars over them. he he he.

When it comes to Violet he has the most patience in the world. He is always teaching her new things, ONE TWO THREE STAND! He is always on the look out for new little teeth, and bribes her with ice. I think violet has gained her love of cookies from him, and grandpa always has them on hand. Violet is his sleeping buddie, and when she falls asleep on his protruding belly he won't move for over 2 hours because he refuses to disturb her slumber. No matter how much he has to do he will sit with her, it is the only time he rests.

Paul is an awsome step-dad and a great grandpa. Even when he exspells toxic fumes. Thank god for air spray.

He Talks to aliens

So in this addition of my blog you will meet my dad, tullio. Super power- confussion, and talking to things that are not there.

My dad is an odd person to say the least. A lover of antiques and Harley Davidson Motercycles. He can go through a junk pile and will find an oil spout and will swear up and down that some day it will be worth millions of dollars. At least he has a hobby.

When I was younger he was convinced that hellicopter lights where really UFOs and the little green guys where telling him what bars to go to. A few times I caught him talking to the sky in a very intricate conversation with the aliens. I never minded though, I just understood that I had "one of those fathers." I am glad that he has accepted in recent years that technology is not of the devil, and that a cordless phone is not going to suck out your brain cells. I keep thinking however, that they are some day going to link brain cancer to phone usage and he would have been right all along.

Yes I know what you are saying. "That man was on drugs" well you wouldn't be wrong. I am happy to say that he has been sober for many many many years, and that is where my pride is for my father. It was tough for some years, I'm not going to lie, but I am believer of "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and "every thing happens for a reason" . You should always leave that line of communication open because people change, and can become great things in their time. With out the experiences my father went through i don't think he would be the man he is today.

A strong, loving, kind, strange man, that loves his family.

I wish he lived closer, and some times I stay up at night thinking how much I want him here. I love watching him with Violet. I love how he will hold her so close and "put put put pufff" she will fart and he sets her gently down on the ground and calls for me "I THINK SHE POOPED!" he is terrified of dirty diapers.

When he is around, Violet is not allowed to cry and if she even sniffles he places her in the stroller and will walk her around the neighborhood until she falls asleep. Well, I think she just falls asleep because once he got lost and couldn't find his way back home so he walked around in circles for ever. One day when she was teething he took her in the stroller about five times, just so she wouldn't cry.

I Love how he tries to stay young by listening to snoop dogg, and will feel the rage at a metal show. Thank god he realizes that he is to old to be in a mosh pitt, but you can see him holding back. I like how every week he lays on the floor puts his reading glasses on and places his bills around him so he can see them all and works them out.

Every morning when I wake up I know the first thing I will see on my cell is a text message from him saying "Good Morning daughter". I giggle when he calls me at eleven o'clock at night when I'm crawling into bed, with nothing to say but "whats up, I'm bored" yup thats, my dad.

An Awsome dude, and a great father.

"The Mother of the Land"

In these next blogs I plan on describing some of my family members. Well, the ones worth mentioning. I feel It is necessary for you to understand what violet will be having to endure as she grows up. Let's just say she will have a eccentric life with these alienesk people. So without further ado (I think that is how you say it) Please meet the cast of this seasons newest show.
"This Family is Wild"

If I could describe my Mother in one word it would be, "humorous".

"The Mother of the land", August Garcia. Watch as she gets blamed for mundane things, as she handles her title of first born. But look, she still manages to walk with a pep in her step. Actually it is a limp from a herniated disk, but folks, she makes it look good. Hard working Gardner, bra-less, woman wonder, can talk her way out of any situation and insult you with out you even knowing it. She is A Mother and grandmother that wears her patch proudly that identifies her as "The Weird One". Super power- absorbs the sun into her skin, and can camouflage herself into any tomato bush.

I used to get upset when people would tell me how much I was like my mother. I wouldn't say that I have acquired my worst traits from her, but....well it is all how you look at it. I think she gave us our family motto, "We are rich guys. RICH IN LOVE!!!" arg when you are 13 and really want a portable cd player. But I look at the values she instilled in me and I can't wait to pass those onto Violet.

Like "Hate, is a bad word" "Laugh when people don't like you, it makes them like you less", "Some where, somebody has it worse" and my all time favorite "the world is your bathroom, so pop a squat"

she can dance (well tries to) through the worst of situations, and will always find something to cook. Was not afraid to let us kids swim in duck poop filled ponds. And always made sure the Easter bunny forgot to boil some of the eggs, so we could chuck em' at each other.

She let me know that I came from the mailman, Aaron came from what the chicken left behind, and and Alex came from the milkman. So proud to call us her children. actually we are all full blooded brother and sisters, from the same mother and father. Just a joke we all got going between the three of us.

When we first moved to New Mexico, my brothers and I couldn't figure out why there wasn't any trees and why every thing was brown. She told us the story of how E.T was flying around and had to go poop really really bad. So he stopped of in chaparral, took a dump, and it smelled so bad every thing died. I think that is still my favorite story she every told us. How sweet right?

She has only given me encouragement as I have become the mother that I am. And never lets me feel like I am doing a bad job. Even when I put the diaper on wrong over and over again, creating large blow outs. She has taught me that collecting baby teeth is not gross, and squirting your little brother with breast milk was actually a funny joke and he just took it wrong.

Violet adores her, and so do I. And I am so lucky that she is violets grandmother. I know that she will always make her laugh, always teach her that life is beautiful, and that fairies are real.

She truly is my best friend.

Well, the Fonseca family is moving back home to Chaparral. The neighbor hood we are living in has been overruled by tweakers, neighbors that play their music to loud, and drug dealers. In other words not an ideal place to be raising a little girl. When we first moved here it was a perfect starter for Jason and I, nice and clean, but it has been three years since then and all I have to say is YUCK!

As I am packing all of our little skeleton trinkets, our Bob Marley bobble head, and roll up Violet's "Nightmare Before Christmas" door poster, I think of the years that have passed. I think of how much our lives have changed, in these few short years. We went from party animals and evolved (or devolved) into mature, clean, hardworking, tired, adults.

I love where I am right now in life. I don't regret anything from my past, even the danger to my health and well being past. It was all an experience. But I wouldn't go back to that place ever. Drugs and druggies are no longer a part of my life. Partys are not what I wake up for, and leaving the dishes in the sink are not acceptable! We both live for our daughter now, and it is a beautiful life. Even the dirty diapers.

So you are probably thinking "where is the comedy?" here it comes.
PACKING SUCKS!!!! all I have to say is I better get my $300 deposit back, because I am busting my balls on this place. They should just give families with babies back their deposit when moving. Because believe me it isn't easy to be packing with the little one all over the place.

Here I am on my hands and knees scrubbing around the toilet with violet giggling and practicing standing holding on to my sweats, while pulling down my pants. Woops sorry world my butt is hanging out, but the child STANDS! And then you are stuck like that, butt hanging out for the world to see because you have already packed the curtains, but you can't move to fast so you don't knock down baby.

Next you have three open boxes with stuff all stacked pretty and neat inside them. Turn the corner for 2 minutes, only to come back and find that Violet doesn't like the way you have packed, and takes it upon herself the take every thing out just so you can do it again. Fun. I remember my mother telling us as kids "if you don't wash the dishes right you are going to have to do ALL of them over again." (always just a threat never followed through) Violet must have gotten that from her.

When you are on a roll you are on a roll. hard to get on a roll with breakfast, bath,snack, lunch, bath, snack, dinner, bath, and between all that play, and lots of diapers.

Violets boxes tower over Jason and mine. The girl has a wardrobe that would make any Holly Wood starlet drool. When did our toys become insignificant compared to her toys?

very slowly it is getting done. And after all the cleaning, the tripping, the crying over her infant clothes, I sit down on my couch exhausted and see that it is all coming together. Then I stroke my leg and realize I haven't shaved in a week and a half, and think "damn I packed my razors!" oh well, I am probably to tired to shave them anyway.

FLIPPING GREY!!

Quick some one run me to Walgreen's! It is urgent, I am in dire need of some major first aid. There has been an accident! Age and time have had a massive collision with my follicles!

"Chantel massage my head," I say to my sister-in-law. Little did I know that five minutes later I would be fighting back tears as she and my mother are heckling like hyenas that have smoke one to many joints. "IT'S GREY!!!" they giggle.

I kept saying "Yeah right, you guys are stupid. Stop making jokes." Then here comes that shiny reflective thing, that I, as most tired worn out mothers avoid as much as possible... A mirror. (who wants to be reminded every morning that the same ol' sweats are out of style, and you just don't have time to pluck those eye brows anymore). And there they where. Shiny patches of snow white hair glistening in the sun against the dark black back drop of my hair.

suddenly (and I'm not joking) visions of 401k, sun spots, wrinkles, hip replacements, retirement homes, and the dreaded forty year mammogram check up are running through my mind. Will my baby making parts even work anymore when I decide to get pregnant again. NO! I can't even say it. You ladies know what I'm talking about. ssshhhh, we will just call it the "M" word.

Go ahead, I don't care if you think I'm over exaggerating. So what if I throw my hands up in the air and stomp and yell. To my older readers who have already gone grey, there is nothing you can say to make it better. To my peers, and younger readers , and those who have not yet been cursed with these little grey strands. Leave me alone and let me pout in my ageing cave of oldness.

I'm only twenty four, but here I am getting flipping grey. My little brother, Aaron, said it best. "You are to old to hang out with us now." The saying is "you get grey hair because of your children". Can this really be true? I refuse to blame this on my sweet violet. No I blame global warming. The melting polar caps are making me grey at a young age. Well, it sounded good in my head.

"I will show you world!! *getting on knees with hands in the sky* I curse you father time!!! Only a man could do this to some one. I'm not washed up, or sold out! I will prove to you gods of aging, wrinkles, and sunspots. I will be the hippest, coolest, grey haired mommy in the world! That I will never be to achy to dance, that prunes will not yet be an every day necessity, and that I will battle this curse with hair dye and I will WIN!" aahhh....I feel better. Must not stress need a foot up on the battle field of grey v.s. young mommy.

now time for some hair quotes....

"Grey hair is a blessing-ask any balding man" Author unknown

"By common consent, grey hairs are a crown of glory; the only object of respect, that can never excite envy." George Bancroft

"How can I control my life if I can't control my hair?" Author unknown

"A hair in the head is worth two in the brush" Oliver Herford